"When I come to the club, step aside (Oh Snap!)
Part the seas, don't be have me in no line. (Oh Snap!)
V.I.P., 'cause you know I gotta shine."
Happy BDay Little Satan!
Some things just get better as time goes by. And just like Great Satan, Little Satan continues to cruise. Totally off the hook in any endeavor - arts, academics, the Beatles, biz, communication, education, medicine, science, space exploration, tech - Little Satan is one sexy magical pixie.
Hotter than a firecracker and twice as loud Little Satan is also nigh indestructable. And She knows it!
Oh Snap! Hanging in apparently the only spot ever in the ME with like zero oil (compy speaking), no friendly homies on her borders, a tiny pop, little real estate (after the show ho's like Gaza, WB and Har Dov Frams included - Little Satan "occupies" less than 1% of the Arab world and less than 1/10th of a % of mohammedist turf), no Suez Canal, no militias or resistance movements, Little Satan's very existence gives the eternal finger to all her failed, backwards, repressive hoodies.
"And I'm like get up out my face, (Oh Snap!)
'fore I turn around and spray your asset with mace. (Oh Snap!)
My lips make you wanna have a taste. (Oh Snap!)
You got that? I got the bass. "
She is far superior, far more humane than Hosni's Egypt, Abdullah's (v2.0) Jordan, Bashar's Syria and ex colonies like Abbas' West Bank , HAMAS' Gaza Strip, Royal Saudiland and embattled Lebanon.
Beaches and biotches - Little Satan puts the 'HO' in "Holy Land."
And like the predator boi down the street (THAT LOOK) - Little Satan's neighbors in the hood just can't let go. They want her soooo bad - If only their hot frenzied fantasies could come true - all would instantly be right in their world.
The tingly feeling would last forever!
"On a certain day everything would be obliterated and instantaneously reconstructed and the new inhabitants would leave, as if by magic, the land they had despoiled; in this way will justice be dispensed to the victims."What the heck is it about about less than 7 million people and turf tiny -er than the Garden State? Why cause Little Satan functions like a rocket rich reject magnet?
Because! Arab consensus is off the hook. Expertly christened the Little Satan - she is the sole soul cause of all the ME's probs.
Al-Jazeera's commandant editor Ahmed Sheikh explains
"The Palestinian cause is central for Arab thinking. It's because we always lose to Israel. It gnaws at the people in the Middle East that such a small country as Israel, with only about 7 million inhabitants, can defeat the Arab nation with its 350 million.Oh Snap! Little Satan - has survived - despite revolutionary Pan Arabic Nat'lism, reactionary mohammedism and the best goodies Warsaw Pact time Russia could create, share and deploy.
That hurts our collective ego. The Palestinian problem is in the genes of every Arab. The West's problem is that it does not understand this.
In many Arab states, the middle class is disappearing. The rich get richer and the poor get still poorer. Look at the schools in Jordan, Egypt or Morocco: You have up to 70 youngsters crammed together in a single classroom. How can a teacher do his job in such circumstances? The public hospitals are also in a hopeless condition. These are just examples. They show how hopeless the situation is for us in the Middle East. "
And this is the real prob for Nakbahland.
Little Satan gives more than the finger - she reflects what could have been - like a mirror - and mirrors don't lie.
Unlike her neighbors - Little Satan has military prowess - yet she's unmilitaristc. She accomodated all faiths - yet remains secular. She absorbs refugees from the entire world - creating loyal, productive citizens throughout an Alamo - Masada environment that created sustained and maintained a tolerant, egalitarian democracy.
The hood of the ME could have learned from this but it didn't. Michael Orrin explains in "6 Days of War" that Little Satan's ME hoodmates are driven.
"Forbidden by dictatorial regimes to voice political ideas on any subject but Israel and increasingly driven by the lack of basic freedoms."Missile magnetic wicked free Little Satan - unabashedly swinging her skirt flirt high enough to almost see her goodies, busting out with bling, high tech and the most PHD's per capita in the entire ME (135 per 10K for staticians).
Chief Economist and director of the Global Competitiveness Network, Augusto Lopex-Claros, confides:
"Israel has become a world technology powerhouse, and this is beginning to have favorable demonstration effect on the rest of the economy. Israel has benefited from the development of culture of innovation, supported by first-class institutions of higher education and scientific research."Little Satan's 60th paints a pic of what could have been. A liberal polity in ancient lands sharing an unbridled affinity for freedom of choice sans antique avatistic tribal superstitions, poverty and abject cruelty.
It's only fitting that Great Satan hits the hood to celebrate with true soul mates in recognition of Little Satan's sometimes perilous, sometimes scary yet always relentless march to hold freedom's lamp aloft in shedding light on a true path to success.
And that mirror lamp reflects more than jealousy and failure
"They do not hate the West because of Israel, they hate Israel because of the West -- because they see it is an island of Western democratic values in a sea of despotism."And Great Satan brings bling to gift her spiritual little sister on this especial joyful moment. Like military pacts and a fully crunk brand spanking new missile killing X Band Radar system that puts the 'ill' in rocket shield.
Created by Raytheon, Great Satan admits X Band is a relentless tracker that can track a baseball from like a range of nearly 3K miles (4.8K kilometers for the metrically inclined) away.
Such bling renders Persian, Gazan or Hiz'B'Allah missilery wizardry about as worthy as a no game player perched on the passenger side of his best friend's ride trying to holler at hotties. Totally null and void.
It is only cool and natch for Great Satan to hook up with Little Satan - just like best girlfriends forever - nigh indistinguishable.
"That is why they call Israel the Little Satan, to distinguish it clearly from the country that has always been and will always be the Great Satan – The United States of America."
Happy BDay Little Satan!